Archive for January, 2014

This just in, from The Sgt Major!

After a 43 month sabbatical the Spam Tin has returned.  Is this one last hurrah, or is there a new wave of spam hitting our inboxes?

As usual we have responded in our usual genuine manner, with our response in italics below.

I am Sgt Major Gabriel Torok,
Greetings Sgt Major Gabriel.  I wonder, have we met before?  Are you perhaps related to the Arcangel? 
I found your name on the amnesty post and because of that i assumed that you are a kind person, therefore i decided to share with you little about what is happening here at war zone believing that together we can use this great opportunity to help the poor. If you accept we can work together to help the poor people, I pray that God will touch your mind and use you to help the poor around you, I can assure you there is no risk since we already have a reliable delivery company that we can use to carry out this delivery without any problem
Thanks but I already have a reliable delivery company, they’re called UPS.
I am excited talking to you today and I am glad to have met someone like you with a kind mind, there is something i will like to share with you and thank God I found the treasure myself after a tough fire exchange with the Taliban’s.
Treasure you say?  Tell me more.
there is something happening here at the war front which I will like to share with you and if you accept we can work together to help the poor people, I pray that God will touch your mind and use you to help the poor around you, I can assure you there is no risk since we already have a reliable delivery company that we can use to carry out this delivery without any problem
Sorry, I’ve just had a terrible case of deja vu from a whole paragraph ago.
there is so much corruption going on here in the military and as a soldier i believe that the only way i will show gratitude to God for saving me at war zone is by doing good, American we fight war to relief the poor and set the captive free not to oppress and suppress the poor, 
I agree, to oppress and suppress is to undress with distress.  Can I have your address?
I sent my friend request to you based on humanity and I blieve together we can work for God by helping the poor children and less privileged with this great opportunity i am going to offer to you now instead of allowing the ungodly fools to continue taking the advantage of the poor, I believe that every human been who love the children and care for their future need to join us in bringing peace to the youth by doing good and showing good example of life, 
Please excuse my ignorance as I have not heard of a human been before.  Is it like a mung bean?
I am in US military; currently I am among the soldier in Afghanistan on peace keeping mission and several times we have discovered treasures like Gold, Diamond, Cash etc, these treasure are discovered after exchanging fire with the Taliban’s at their hide out place, these are the treasures the Taliban’s uses to purchase war materials they are using to kill the innocent people while some innocent motherless children continue to suffer in hunger
Did you find any Bitcoins?  Maybe even a Bitcoin mine?  I understand they are like golddust.
so many times after exchanging fire with them and we succeeded in entering into their hide out place, such treasure are discovered and all this treasure when discovered are being sent to the government to support the charity work, lately we have also discovered that none of this money are being used the right way instead the government officials take the benefit alone act of greediness which is the number one problem of the world today, one person want to own the world and every other person become his tenant
You do know I’m a member of the UK Parliament, right?
As soldiers we believe doing good is the only way we can show gratitude to God who saved us during the war and we also believe God will continue saving people who are doing good work, but finally we have find out that this money when sent to the government, one of the top officials always divert it into a personal bank account for only their family benefit and inheritance to unborn children while the motherless already born babies continue to suffer hunger, some of them will use it for their political position without considering the motherless children who need this money to feed
We must create some kind of diversion to stop this money being diverted.  If only there was a way.
Because of the above reason my team have agreed to stop sending any money to government and now we are looking for individual who can work together with us in helping the hopeless children, I considered to be your friend on facebook after going through your profile, it touches my mind that we can work with you and I considered you as the best person we can use to reach the needy around you after the little conversation we had, Please I want you to consider the innocent children that are suffering and take this obligation of working with my team to help the motherless children
I am definitely considering it.
We the soldiers here have concluded that working hard and continue sending to government is like the sacrifice of Ken in the bible which never reach heaven therefore we must act fast and find the best way our sacrifice can reach the motherless through your help.
Who is this Ken you speak of?  Is he a secret disciple? In biblical times I understand Ken was quite a popular name, along with Fred and Sidney.
This is not going to cost you any stress since we have a reliable source to bring the gift at your doorstep
Is this UPS again?  I have a contract with them if that helps?
and all you do is to distribute it to the proper charities around you who deserve this money. this is all i can said for now and i hope you can give your service, as soldiers everything we are doing with you must be kept secret to protect our job
if will be interested to be as my next kin to help me collect this treasure from the delivery then do let me know 
I am very interested in you and your next kin.  Please send me all of your Bitcoins, loaded into an unmarked UPS truck to ensure a safe delivery.  I have many distribution channels across Europe, and working with my partner Eddie Stobart will ensure a safe onwards delivery.
thank you till i hear from you,
Sgt Major Gabriel Torok,

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