Today’s meaty goodness comes directly from the “Trust and Safety Department” of online auctioneers eBay. Spams and scams are one of the biggest problems for eBay, so let’s try and help them out a little by taking one on in a live fight!
- Dear eBayer, We are contacting you about the item you sold on eBay.
Exactly which item is this relating to? I sell many items on eBay but in recent days my most successful selling items have been the Nokia 6500 and the Clitmaster 5000, so I guess it’s one of those? Please can you confirm your interest.
- The buyer has made payment for your item and the item is yet to be posted to the given address.We will like to know if you have posted the item so that your account can be credited immediately you send the tracking number to us.Note that you have committed yourself that you are going to send the item out.
Again it depends on the item in question. The Nokia I had no problem in sending but the Clitmaster 5000 is classed as outsize and marked fragile - it can literally go off at the slightest touch and must be personally couriered to you at a speed of no greater than 15mph as it really is a danger to the public.
- Please respond by April-7-2008 so eBay knows whether you have agreed.
Oh goodness, please accept my most humble apologies as I did not discover your mail until this very day. For some bizarre reason my mail client had popped it into the spam box.
- Respond to this notice or your account will be block.
Block? Oh please don’t block it Mr eBay, I know I am late in responding to you but I cannot survive without my eBay account. If you were to block it I would not be able to sell my stockpile of stuffed beavers and I am already in trouble with the wife for having 972 of them in our bedroom. She claims she has trouble sleeping with all those bright white teeth glowing in the darkness.
What will it take for my account not to be blocked? I will do anything. Please advise.
- Please don’t hesitate to contact us directly through this email if you have further queries or require assistance. Regards, Customer Support (Trust and Safety Department) eBay International AG.
Thank you eBay, please hurry as my beaver bonanza begins soon!
Yours faithfully,
Jimmy Changga.
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